i was being a terrible, snotty brat. throwing temper tantrums, saying 'no' for no real reason, etc.
we were laying on the bed at the time and B, having had enough, told me to roll onto my stomach. i've been having arm problems [slept wrong, you know the deal] and didn't move fast enough for his liking, so he grabbed my legs and flipped me over. he grabbed my panties by the ass and RIPPED them off. i have to say, it was really sexy. before my mind really had time to process the act, SMACK B's hand hit my ass. then twice more. REALLY hard, to where i flinched and put my hands over my ass as i yelped in pain, tears coming to my eyes. "that's for being a brat," he said as he scooped me into his arms. the next day, i got a pack of brand new panties to replace the one he'd ripped and an apology for having been so rough. which i didn't mind, i just happen to like my panties.
however, that didn't seem to make me kick the brat habit. B's trying to break me of the disrespectful attitude i've had, and i can't say i've been too cooperative like i should be. we had the stricter conversation, so i was given a bedtime and a time to wake up [i LOVE to sleep, and i'll do it all day if i'm allowed] and this morning i refused. i'm supposed to wake up at 9.30A so i can do school work from 10A-12P, since i'm currently going online. this was MY idea, and he enforced it because he knows it's important, and i ignored him. i told him to leave me alone and rolled over.
i fell asleep, and a few hours later he'd gone to take a shower to get ready for work. when he came back, i reached for him and he had this ... very unhappy look on his face. i asked him what was wrong.
"is this really what you want?" he said, in deference to our relationship. "cos you tell me you want rules, i give them to you, and you continue to fight me."
"of course it is, baby, i was just tired...." i said meekly.
"cos we can change our dynamic and just be in a regular old relationship," he told me.
"no, no, that's not what i want," i protested.
"well, you say you want me in charge, you want me to own you and control you, but you can't follow a rule. a rule that's GOOD for you and enables us to have more time together," he said, "that's why i did it. so that we could spend time together before i go to work," which made me feel totally like shit. i had no idea, it hadn't occurred to me.
"you've got two days to think about it," he said. so i protested again that, yes, this is what i want. "then you've got two days to prove it to me. and yer not gonna like it,"
"why not?" i asked.
"because you won't be allowed to cum at all," he told me. i was told that if this is what i want, i have to prove it. i have to do what he tells me to, because after all that's what i want. we talked about it a little more on his lunch break, where he told me it's not that he doesn't love me; just if this is what i want, i need to give myself to him and stop fighting.
i didn't think i was being that terrible, but i guess i was wrong.
so today, i'm trying harder.
i'm making sure to have dinner DONE before he gets home, and i cleaned.